Not as planned

Well, this day didn't go as I planned.  I wanted to maybe write a letter to Nathaniel, which I guess I did here on my blog.  I wanted to maybe have the kids write letters or draw a picture that I could put in his memory box.  I wanted to maybe release balloons today.  None of that happened.  I awoke this morning feeling awful and it just continued to get worse.  I have the flu. 

I keep wondering why today of all days.  Maybe God just didnt' want me to dwell on today or to be sad about what today 'could be'.  With how sick I am I haven't had a chance to think about this day much, aside from the sweet comments, emails or cards I've gotten.  And that is ok.  I don't want to be totally sad, making the day totally miserable.  I know God doesn't want that either.  But I also want to remember.

In light of my sickness today my children were so well-behaved (maybe I need to be sick more often).  I went downstairs twice all day, and both times regretted that.  I've only gotten out of bed, outside of those two times, to head to the bathroom.  My oldest, who is 10, has been a huge help.  I asked if she'd take the youngest downstairs to breakfast this morning and she did.  From there she was Superwoman today- taking over the affairs of the household!  She put dishes in the dishwasher away, washed dishes by hand, continually cleaned up, made sure they all ate lunch, brought me breakfast (though I could only eat about 5 bites), made me a card and had her brothers do the same, etc, etc.  What a huge blessing!  I haven't had the flu in ages and I'm so thankful for that!  I could not imagine being this sick if I didn't have my little helper girl!  She is such a servant!  She kept coming to me and asking if I wanted something to eat. 

I had a few friends offer to bring dinner or watch kids, but I don't want to pass this on!  My dear friend, C, who I know through our homeschool group brought dinner for our family!  What a blessing that was!  Thank you so very much, C!

Zach came home from work with smoe medicine for me, as well as three roses- yellow, red and pink for our three heavenly babies and a sweet, sweet card.  I cried, of course. 

So today took a different turn than I had planned in my haed.  I can see the good in it, even though I'm still very, very miserable in bed!  And it is a good 'feeling' to see good in light of something bad!  It takes time, friends, but it'll happen.  Do not lose hope!  Please pray the rest of my family doesn't get this.  It is miserable!