Whew, that was more difficult than I anticipated

Today I went to a Grief Symposium at a local funeral home.  I offered to go and help Teske with the Mommies with Hope table, but I also was interested in the topic- Grief & the Holidays.  I have been dreading the approaching holidays and was hoping to obtain some great info on how to survive the upcoming months.  Rather than much of a talk, they had different activities planned and it was very good.  We broke up into different 'sections' to do various activities and it was difficult yet good.  One of the things we did was make an ornament.  It was glass and we could put tinsel inside.  I wrote Nathaniel's name on it and his 'birth'day.  i think it will be a special treasure and addition to our tree.  It really tore me apart to hear bits and pieces of people talking who've lost loved ones.  Moms, spouses...and elderly man by me saying he didn't know how he wasn't looking forward to the holidays at all since his wife died 7 months ago.  I just wanted to break into tears.  I did cry a bit at one point and could've probably balled at other points, but I held it in.  I didn't want to lose it!  I'm very glad I was able to go.  I have a whole folder of information and I look forward to reading about ways I can remember our babies this Christmas season.  On a bit of a 'funny' note (funny to me), as the different people representing organizations went to the front and spoke a bit of what resources they offer I was feeling a bit like a social worker!  It reminded me so much of college, my internship and learning the different resources in communities.  On a side note for those who don't know I have a BSW (Bachelor of Social Work) degree.